I Think, Therefore I'm Not

Descartes had it wrong when he said “I think, therefore I am.” 

Our thoughts are not what define us and make us who we are. They come and go like the wind and over time through practice we learn how they operate and how insubstantial they really are.

When we get caught up in our thinking minds, we’re separating ourselves from our lives and each other. 

The moment I create a story about what is happening around me rather than simply experiencing it directly, I’m caught in a dualistic situation with a “me” over here and a “you” over there and this horrendous gap between us that needs to be filled with ideas and concepts and assumptions. These various kinds of thoughts usually lead to conflict and misunderstandings which only serve to perpetuate a cycle of delusion and unhappiness that causes suffering for ourselves and others.

The Buddha was very clear that all things are interdependent, interconnected, and interrelated. No one being or thing exists independently of all other beings or things. 

In Opening the Hand of Thought, there’s this wonderful analogy about Rodin’s sculpture “The Thinker” and how his hunched forward, contorted posture is one that encourages “chasing after illusions.” 

This kind of pose is perfectly well suited for a toilet seat, but it’s not a posture that ought to be maintained throughout the rest of the day.

By contrast, the posture we assume when we meditate in a chair or cushion reflects our inherently upright and clear nature. Breathing happens more easily, the spine is open and long, and it encourages us to be immersed in the reality of our situation as opposed to our ideas about it.

It’s a posture we can always assume regardless of where we find ourselves--in fact I notice that when I’m wrapped up in thought or worry, my body is more tense and my shoulders are falling forward and inward. By simply straightening myself up into a posture that more closely resembles the one I assume during formal practice, an immediate mental shift takes place and it drastically improves the quality of my thoughts and mood. 

Give it a try.

Arriving at Your True Self by way of the small self

When I first started practice, I really thought I’d discovered a way to bypass all of that messy self-reflection stuff I had been engaging in for so long through various methods-- psychotherapy being the most ongoing one. If I just meditate everyday, I thought, I’ll be able to magically erase all of the conditioning, karma, and years of habit energy that brought me to where I am today. And then and only then will I be able to come back to my Buddha nature.

I at least had it half right--regular meditation practice does allow us to gradually return to the natural state of our minds as they are before thinking and conceptualization arises. However, there’s just no avoiding all of the muck we’ve accumulated since our earliest years, because these layers of spiritual and emotional grime obscure our pure and awakened nature. 

After all, even a nugget of gold can’t shine brilliantly until the dirt gets cleared away.

Meditation is not about arriving at some mystical state that makes introspection an obsolete endeavor: rather it’s a process by which we need to take a good, close look at how our minds work so that we no longer have to be quite so beholden to them. Instead of being driven around by the race car that is our brain, we train ourselves to take a firm hold of the steering wheel and drive the car instead of allowing it to drive us around until it eventually causes us to crash into a wall. 

So we simply learn to notice our brain, the thoughts it secretes, and the stories we’ve spent years creating about who we are what life is like. These narrow confines we operate within drastically limit the ways in which we can respond to life, and cause us to act and react in rather predictable and unhealthy ways.

Just by being fully present with things as they are and watching our minds from moment to moment to moment, we have the opportunity to gradually peel away each layer of the cocoon that keeps us feeling trapped, and distorts our view so that life appears to be nothing but one long and lonely struggle. 

Weekend Mindfulness Retreat in NYC - Registration Now Open!

I will be co-facilitating & teaching this weekend retreat with my dharma sister Kimberly Brown:

January 18, 19, 20, 2013

Friday 7-9 pm, Saturday 10-6 pm, Sunday 10-1:30 pm

“In mindfulness one is not only restful and happy, but alert and awake. Meditation is not evasion; it is a serene encounter with reality.” ― Thich Nhat Hanh

with Kimberly Brown & Ven. Lawrence Do'an Grecco

IDP Weekend retreats are a wonderful opportunity to immerse yourself in the practices and teachings of the Buddhist tradition in the support of a group environment.  The focus for this retreat is the Buddha's original teaching on the Four Foundations of Mindfulness and will include:

• Dharma talks and practice instruction
• In-depth meditation
• Short yoga breaks 
• Discussion

This practice-based retreat will take place Friday evening 7-9pm, Saturday10am-6pm, and Sunday 10am-1:30pm, leaving students with ample time to relax and integrate the practice on Sunday afternoon.

PLEASE NOTE:  If you are unable to attend the entire weekend, you may enroll for portions of it.  Contact Kim@theidproject.org for registration details. 

There will be lunch breaks on Saturday and Sunday, but lunch will not be provided. Participants should bring a bag lunch or take advantage of the diverse eateries available in the neighborhood.

Ven. Lawrence Dō'an Grecco (Do'an Dharma) is a fully ordained monk in the Vietnamese Zen tradition of Ven. Dr. Thich Thien-An. He is also an authorized Zen teacher in the Korean Zen tradition as represented by the Five Mountain Zen Order. In addition, Lawrence received authorization as a dharma teacher from the Interdependence Project, and holds a certificate in Foundations in Buddhist Chaplaincy from the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care. He writes for Sweeping Zen, The Interdependence Project, and Open Sky Zen, and works with individuals and couples as a life coach and wedding officiant. Lawrence is the Founding Director of Open Sky Zen Meditation & Buddhist Studies Group which meets regularly in Manhattan and the facilitator of Queer Sangha which meets at the Interdependence Project in Manhattan. For more information about Lawrence, please visit www.lawrencegrecco.com.

Kimberly Brown is both a student and a teacher at The Interdependence Project.  She's a graduate of the first year-long IDP Training Immersion Program, is a Tibetan Buddhist, trains with Sokuzan Bob Brown, and practices Kriya Yoga with Alan Finger.  Kimberly has degrees in physics and literature, and spent several years in post-graduate training as a psychodynamic psychotherapist.  She teaches dharmaclasses and meditation at IDP and privately, and is filled with tremendous gratitude for The Interdependence Project community and its founder, Ethan Nichtern. Follow her on Facebook and Twitter.

Cost:

$120 - Non-Members
$90 - Full Members
$60 - Sustaining Members
$30 - Endowing Members

(Click here for more information on Membership and how much your support helps IDP.)

(Note: IDP Weekend Retreats are very popular and often sell out.  A $40 deposit is required to reserve your seat for this retreat.)

IDP is commited to accommodating students experiencing financial hardship.   If you'd like to attend this retreat but are unable to afford it, please inquire about our work-study options by emailing  marisa@theidproject.org. 

Please read our Security Policy and Refund Policy

Is it OK to Have Great Ideas or Insights During Meditation?

Nature is the Best Dharma Teacher

We live in a world that emphasizes results, rewards, and winning.

If we buy something at a store we get our rewards card swiped in order to accumulate points that lead to a future benefit. Many of us get up early in the morning in order to go to work so we can earn enough money to pay for the apartment or house we moved to in order to be close to the job that pays for it. We exercise with the expectation that it will improve our health and appearance. Art is produced in the hopes that it will be reviewed well, seen by millions, and perhaps result in a fabulous Career. A first date gets clouded with fantasies about whether or not this person sitting across from me at the dimly lit dinner table will one day be my husband or wife or significant other.

Meditation practice is often seen as a way to fix what’s wrong with us instead of what it actually is: a living, breathing example of how we’re just fine to begin with.

Our practice asks us to be fully engaged with each precious, fleeting moment. It’s a physical and mental process that trains us to keep coming back to reality—that is, to keep coming back to things as they are right now; not as they were or how we hope they will be or how we fear they might turn out.

The best dharma teachers in the world never give formal lectures or charge any money for their teachings. They’re all around us, teaching us constantly but we regard them as meaningless background noise and so we ignore them.

If you watch a bird fly around, you’ll notice she’s doing so without lots of worry or planning piled on top of her flight. A bird doesn’t get jealous of the swans she sees swimming below or the ducks to the north that are clearly having a much better time than she is. She just flies and eats and sleeps without scrutinizing or obsessing.

Clouds float by easefully, constantly changing their shape and form without stressing out over it, without being concerned as to whether or not they’re being seen and admired, and not wishing they were whiter or fluffier or higher up in the sky.

But we humans habitually move forward in this life with the breaks on—second-guessing, attaching agendas and goals, criticizing ourselves and every aspect of our experience…and we miss a whole lot when we live this way.

The key is to keep coming back over and over again, fully engaging with life as it is at any given moment. When we do this we have the opportunity to exist with the same grace and ease as a bird or a cloud. We can get out of our own way, drop the stories we have about our lives, and approach everything with a freshness and freedom that allows for a happiness that isn’t reliant on results or outer circumstances.

“However much one enjoys the song of birds, they are not singing for the advancement of music, and the clouds are not floating across the sky to be painted by artists.”

 – Alan Watts, “Still the Mind”